Humans have always discussed and conversed on how to ultimately find happiness and live a fulfilled life, from ancient roman philosophers to today’s online forums. Nevertheless, happiness is an elusive word and may differ in its connotations depending on whom we are talking to. Do we even know what happiness would look like for each individual and whether happiness is a constant estate of being or a sum of multiple moments of joy?
Positive psychology has provided some answers and research and summarised that it might be about expressing positive emotions, being engaged with an activity that mesmerises us and immerses us in a state of flow, where we seem to lose our sense of self and activities that we sincerely enjoy. Finally find meaning in what we do and feel a sense of purpose. This framework proposed that while these elements would bring us happiness, we must pair these with life satisfaction, understood as one’s life evaluation. Then perhaps, we would have achieved the formula to keep increasing positive emotions that would place us in a good mood and increase our social connections, creating life satisfaction and, indeed, finding the key to a fulfilled life.
This premise appears logical; it would work if we were constant beings. However, as humans, we are unpredictable, we face challenges, and maintaining the status quo of being consistently in a good mood is unattainable. Perhaps the social pressure, the posts, the books, the propaganda, social media, etc. Instead of promoting wellness, it paints an unrealistic picture and a goal that may feel so far away and sometimes unattainable, leaving us with a sense of failure, unworthiness, and low self-esteem. Once defeated, as we compare ourselves, always with who appears better than us, we sink into depression and hopelessness.
Here is where we need to reflect on what happiness means. Firstly, it’s based on what makes us happy, whether being with people, buying things, having an experience, being in nature, doing our hobby, or just sitting watching tv. Everyone will have a different answer. However, one commonality is that whatever we do, we need to feel grateful and appreciate the moment.
This brings us to be open to living consciously aware of the present moment, taking one day at a time, noticing our surroundings, feeling grounded, connected, and immersed in either engagement with others or the activities we choose to do where we experience a state of flow. When we live moment to moment, we suddenly notice what is around us, our focus becomes more explicit, and our senses heightened. Whatever experience we are immersed in becomes brighter and more meaningful.
When we feel we are present, we finally have a sense of awe, and many positive emotions flow, this cheerful mood suddenly uplifts our whole being, and we become real; we feel alive, which is what positive psychology has identified as “flourishing.”
“Flourishing is the product of the pursuit and engagement of an authentic life that brings inner joy and happiness through meeting goals, being connected with life passions, and relishing in accomplishments through the peaks and valleys of life.”-Lynn Soots-
This definition aligns more with what we can accomplish, pursue, and maintain. As flourishing is not a character trait that we possess or not, it’s a shift in our mindset that onsets a way of living by practising mindfulness and learning to live in the present moment. This concept, while separate, is aligned with “happiness.” It’s attainable because it would require effort and a clear intention, which means we can make it happen.
Like many other things in life, we must practice and decide that if we want a different outcome, we must do something different. Therefore, Happiness is not a given, nor can we buy it, be gifted with it, or find it somewhere. Happiness is not an isolated concept, it’s more of a three-part puzzle that, when put together, delivers the complete picture.
It encompasses well-being, happiness, and life satisfaction. In recent years, positive psychology has inclusively added some new information about the role of spiritual values and practices that aid overall well-being. However, that is a matter to discuss in another blog.
When an individual can recognise and work towards achieving flourishment, he can liberate himself from negative thought patterns. When we choose a mindful way of living by being conscious of our choices, we also become aware of pessimistic thoughts, recognise what kind of stories keep us trapped in that estate, and we can try to choose not to engage with them.
In sum, flourishing is a step towards mental health and well-being, based on developing mindful strategies and awakening to live more present in the now.
